Interesting evening after my last post. Just before I drift off to sleep, I decide to check my email one last time. I see an email from the ex-boyfriend…oh god, NOW WHAT?!?. The body of the email explains that he “ate a bunch of psychedelic mushrooms and is “tripping out…dude…everything is psychedelic man.”
For a moment…I get nostalgic, and remember the trippy times I had back in the day…loooong before I became a chemical dependency counselor….but this quickly passes as I also recall the “trip” when I thought my eyes and mouth were glued shut and I was left to deal with my own thoughts for six hours…and that put a stop to my nostalgia.
So…to entertain myself, I proceed to trip him out further…nothing sinister…just enough to humor myself and to make him pay for keeping me up at 11pm. He went on and on about how messed up it was that Bernic Mac & Isaac Hayes were dead…and then proceeded to pour his heart out and say he loved me…wanted me to hold him in my arms….etc.
It was at that point that I ended the email and went to bed. I mean, I still love the guy…there’s a physical attraction….but he always wants to go to the next level, tripping on ’shrooms or not. Just let it be…
I am happy I’m away from that chaos. If it wasn’t psychedelics, it was some other substance…almost every night. Imagine this…the stress of dealing with addicts all day, only to come home and deal with it too?!? Thank GOD that’s over. Not only did it give me constant anxiety, but it was difficult to justify dealing with this because of my profession. Had I known these issues prior to our relationship, there would’ve been no way I would have gone any futher with it.
It’s good to watch all of this from a distance…and having the peace knowing if I don’t want to deal with him…I can just not answer his emails or see him….ahhh…..free at last.
